What does it say that I’ve lived in five of the top 12 “Best Cities for Singles” (according to Forbes Magazine), and I have visited another five (of the top 11) in the past seven years (all tarot related trips) yet haven’t dated since my divorce?
I was struck by the oddity of this coincidence (since among the other 28 cities I’ve only lived in one and visited three). [I admit D.C. was a bit of a cheat since we lived in Falls Church though we were there because my father worked in D.C.]
I drew three cards (no spread positions) to answer my question and got (in the order I drew them):
The King of Wands, Five of Pentacles and King of Swords. 
I suppose the cities could be pure coincidence, but it doesn’t feel like it, and the spread seems very odd—like something I don’t really want to know. Since, there are times when we all need someone else’s opinion I’d like to ask for help in understanding this. Please comment. Feel free to be wild with your thoughts—don’t hold back. I should mention—I lived in three of these cities as an army brat (King of Swords?). I’ve always loved the travel and no hardship was involved, so it’s hard to see the Five of Pentacles as referring to anything external.
I see this as an example of how the silliest of seeming coincidences can be a catalyst that takes us deep into the hidden realms of ourselves if we bother to look. The question at the top was what popped into my head spontaneously as I looked at the list. I decided to take the question seriously and see what came up.
ADDED: The comments have taken me on an incredible journey of insight that has reached so many levels. However, the most immediately significant thing for me is that my father (identified above as possibly the King of Swords) died on Thursday (9/11-Patriot Day) at a military nursing home. He had worn an electronic buzzer (see bell around cripple’s neck) that would go off whenever he tried to get out of his wheel chair. This seems like a foreshadowing similar to that mentioned in my post on Prediction or Insight. After all, my inquiry arose in the first place because I couldn’t understand why that silly list wouldn’t let me go. I phrased the question in the only way that made sense to me at that time. [BTW, I originally posted this on 9/9 (my time zone was incorrect).]
Mary K. Greer has made tarot her life work. Check here for reports of goings-on in the world of tarot and cartomancy, articles on the history and practice of tarot, and materials on other cartomancy decks. Sorry, I no longer write reviews. Contact me
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September 10, 2008 at 2:07 am
Katja
King of Wands: Represents an entrepreneur, a self-starter, may represent travel, supportive of your dreams.
5 of Pentacles: Signifies loss, underemployment, temporary hardship.
King of Swords: Represents new ideas, putting thoughts down on paper, brain-storming, new solutions, possible legal dealing.
This doesn’t really address your question, but to me the cards suggest that you might want to consider writing a book … maybe about travel … in order to avoid financial hardship.
But I’m an absolute neophyte when it comes to Tarot, so this is only a guess … love your blog!
~Katja
September 10, 2008 at 2:48 am
Joanna Powell Colbert
Hi Mary,
OK, I’m not holding back. 🙂
My intuitive hit on these cards is that the two Kings represent the kind of men that you are either attracted to or repelled by (or both). Perhaps the King of Wands is the warm, passionate guy and the King of Swords is the analytical, “don’t pin me down” kind of guy. I think the 5 of Pents reflects your own sense of lack, like: “in all these cities known for being friendly for singles, there’s no one for me!”
So I think the counsel would be (assuming that you *want* to date; maybe you’re happy not dating) . . . to turn the 5 of Pents upside down, or to focus on the warm interior of the church, where there are bright colors and the sense of belonging. In other words, to start looking for plenty of quality men to date and to expect to find them . . . and you will.
September 10, 2008 at 3:19 am
Richard
I’d start by looking at what’s _not_ there…. which is to say… no cards bringing in a watery/receptive influence. With that in mind, see that the central card is literally surrounded by men! But, it’s the five of pentacles… how on earth is that situation so cold? Well, you have analytical Mercury misleading the already stubborn Taurus… over-thinking and fearing the worst… keeping your head down rather than living in the moment and seeing what’s possible. No reason to be cold when there’s a warm building just to the left, not to mention that whole “surrounded by men” situation. 🙂
To my way of reading, all three of these cards represent influence from fixed signs (leo, taurus, aquarius)… Taking that with the fact that none of the figures on the cards are looking at each other, I’d say part of the situation is that both you and the eligible men are following a course you’ve set possibly years ago… no one seems naturally inclined to try something new or change direction.
I don’t normally try to read other people’s cards, but I have to admit that was fun! I hope it was either helpful, or so off-base that you had a nice laugh.
September 10, 2008 at 3:38 am
suz
I’m not skilled in counsel – but fwiw I’ll lend what pricks my attention:
-i’m struck by the bracketing of the 5 pents by masculine energy, holding their implements in their left hands –
-and the movement from left card (gazing backward, clear blue sky) to the right card (gazing forward, some clouds, wider view (trees visible))
-and the changes in implements and how they’re deployed …
KWands: has a light grip (the weight of the single wand rests on the ground, possibly leaning in)
5 pents: the “male” figure leans on two wooden crutches for support
KSwords: has a stronger grip holding the full weight of single sword – in a tenuous balance
September 10, 2008 at 5:19 am
Lila
You said don’t hold back so I won’t. I don’t usually read RWS but this picture is very strong. The female self looks needy, unhappy, stuck (Thoth raising its head here), left out in the cold. The two male energies seem to disregard the feminine seeker for help. And she is not only a seeker for help, she supports the poor male figure limping behind her. I see this as the animus of the woman, a hurt and painful animus trying to keep up with the feminine and unable to give her the hint yet.
The two kings: the kings of hot energy and the king of cool reason. The earthy pentacle minor may have to counterbalance the heat with the cold to find her ideal temperature. (The snow seems to hint that the temperature is wrong, the place is wrong, too).
There is a strong flavour of a fairy tale here, like the princess on the bean (is she in English called like that?) who had to pass alll kinds of tests, walk around in the cold, sleep on the famous bean, until she was accepted by the prince. Although she was a princess herself. Kings feel superior although they are not.
But she may also be the wise woman who has learned to steer clear of kings and authority figures.
Numbers: five places, five pentacles. Five pieces of the earth, but the earth is frozen.
Elements: one is lacking. The queen of cups is biding her time and waiting. You can see she is there, in the frozen snow. She sent her frozen waters down but it hurts more than it helps.
Did the Sword King freeze you, and the Wands King threatened to thaw you too quickly, poor princess in the snow? Is this why you don’t think of the water?
It seems to me the waters have to flow again, the leg of the animus will heal, the woman will look up and will find the throne waiting for her. Crowned with sea shells, of course, to complete the tableau.
So, I wrote incoherent stuff, but this is how I do my tarot 😉
September 10, 2008 at 5:54 am
Kalessin
K of Wands: Independent, self-sufficient, creative, ambitious, generous, goal-oriented, adventurous. Marcia Marsino says the K of Wands enjoys “lively arguments, heated debates, and laughing, joking and teasing.” He is also involved with clubs, organizations, and humanitarian pursuits.
You may be drawn to cities that nurture your independent spirit and provide a stage to showcase your creativity and leadership ability. Perhaps they have been fertile ground for success in your career as a teacher and lecturer. What is it that you debate? For starters, you probably prefer cities with people who can engage you in debating subjects like Tarot: it’s history, meaning, and purpose. The K of Wands likes excitement, so perhaps you are also drawn to hoppin’ cities. The K of Wands loves life, and you go wherever new adventures await and you can live life to the fullest, and give back to your community by assisting others in accomplishing their goals.
5 of Pentacles: Poverty, loss, instability, misfortune.
IMHO, consciously or not, you may seek out cities where social change is afoot and people are less fortunate, to help lift them up. Perhaps they are also spiritually poor (note the temple window, which affords no comfort), so you inspire them by nourishing their spirits. You know that the world can be a better place, and you strive to do your part to bring change (# 5) by enlightening others to their potential.
K of Swords: Intellectual, educator, writer, speaker, fairness, impartiality, “recognition for specialized skills” (Marsino). “Challenges have been met and conquered; wisdom and discrimination have been gained” (Marsino).
I normally read the card to the far right as the past, but is it possible that you have lived in cities that have provided you with the opportunities or education to hone your talents as a reader and writer, and where you have received recognition for your skills? Perhaps that is where you also gained your sense of fairness and honesty, through the experiences you had there.
Some have commented on the predominance of male energy in the cards. Perhaps you have also sought places that allow you to buck the male-dominated society and prove your worth. One thing is certain, I think: Wherever you live, you fulfill a role as a *leader* and decision-maker, as noted by the two kings.
September 10, 2008 at 5:57 am
Kalessin
P.S. I have lived in five of the top 30 cities.
September 10, 2008 at 9:10 am
mkg
Everyone, thank you for your interpretations. I was curious why I had such a strong—though humorous—reaction to the list. I found myself replaying scenes from each of the places where I had lived, while the question kept running through my head. An indication to pay attention. When I pulled the cards they surprised me and I realized I didn’t really want to interpret them. All this suggested that something was up!
Katja – writing about the issue is certainly a way that I face it. I hadn’t thought about travel writing – although my ex-husband (King of Swords) wrote a couple of major travel books focused on “vagabonding” – huuum, vagabonding can include things like sleeping on park benches or in cemeteries. He’s certainly told some stories that fit perfectly with the Five of Pentacles! Thanks for that piece of the puzzle.
September 10, 2008 at 9:21 am
mkg
Joanna – You wrote: “I think the 5 of Pents reflects your own sense of lack, like: ‘in all these cities known for being friendly for singles, there’s no one for me!'” This might be closer to home than I’d like to admit. For years I’ve had no interest in dating, but perhaps there’s a part of me that thinks differently. Still, I look at the Kings and think, “I really don’t want to go there.”
Richard – Ah, you noticed the lack of Cups. I agree that I don’t feel inclined to change direction. My North Node is in Taurus in the 7th House, but I’m far more comfortable with my South Node in Scorpio in the 1st, especially since I have no Earth signs or houses in my chart.
Suz – If I’m understanding you right, you’re suggesting a crippled animus? I think you’re on to something there. The bracketing of the 5P by the two Kings really struck me, too, but I never thought of their implements as being like the two crutches.
September 10, 2008 at 9:29 am
mkg
Lila – Yes, you are the one who named the wounded animus. I really like your phrases “king of hot energy” and “king of cool reason.” You mention that the “place is wrong.” Certainly, living in a small town, which I love, is not very conducive to either choice or privacy. You wrote: “she may also be the wise woman who has learned to steer clear of kings and authority figures.” I’m afraid that I feel this is true, but that I may be left out in the cold because of it. Am not so sure about a frozen Queen of Cups. However, I wonder if my attitude would change in a warmer, more sultry environment?
Kalessin – I wonder if I do need a change of environment? I get the excitement when I travel, but I’ve found that just recently my formerly strong group of friends is dispersing and things are seeming a little bleak. I think you could be right about being mostly recognized for the Kingly things about myself. When I think of tarot mastery I see myself as Queenly when reading for others, but I spend far more time in Kingly pursuits as intellectual, teacher, authority, self-sufficient, etc.
This has been very, very helpful. Thank you all.
September 10, 2008 at 9:46 am
Connie
Mary, I too was struck by the 5 of Pentacles bracketed by such strong male figures. It is almost as though the central card sings out “Men, Men everywhere, but not one for me!”
My intuitive interpretation of this reading is that there is something within you that still needs to be healed from your previous relationships with strong men. And until you do the necessary inner work that is called for here, you will feel “crippled” by old stories and insecurities from the past.
Your acknowledged reluctance to “go there” holds a very important message for you. What is holding you back? And what do you need to do to move beyond your fears of inadequacy and insecurity? Only you know the answers to these questions…are you ready to “go there”?
Warmest wishes,
Connie
September 10, 2008 at 10:08 am
mkg
Connie – The insights are getting more and more uncomfortably close to home. The need for healing is probably more right than I want to acknowledge. I feel really insecure about doing the work required to heal old relationship wounds that both I and any other mature adult carry. I look at my friend’s relationships and know I don’t want the issues they have to deal with. However, the very fact that I’m willing to entertain this question suggests a possible turning point—or not??
September 10, 2008 at 1:55 pm
Daniel
A rudimentary Past-Present-Future Interpretation:
King of Wands: Through your life experiences you have claimed your personal power and are very comfortable with it.
Five of Pentacles: Your current vibration and focus, whether intentional or unintentional, is on lack and separation. A lack of dates, a lack of an enriching partnership, and the acknowledgment of a divorce (again a concept of separation). This energetic vibration of lack is even supported by the phrase used in the presenting question “. . . yet haven’t dated since my divorce . . .” Even the question is phrased in a way that gives voice to lack (“haven’t dated”) and spearation (“divorce”) — the things you don’t want.
King of Swords: You are likely to keep potential suitors “at bay” as they experience you as guarded. You do not want to get hurt again and you are more comfortable focusing on intellectual pursuits and aspects. Your ease and comfort with the intellect stands in the way of connecting with another though the heart. Plus, your intelligence can intimidate other suitors (though it’s likely these are suitors you would not want anyway).
What’s missing: The suit of cups, which says if (or when) dates are desired, you must first allow more energy to flow through your heart chakra. Some questions for next steps include: How can I remain powerful AND approachable? How can I enjoy my intellect with another AND share my heart which the other as well? How can I allow another to see how I feel and maintain a positive and comoftable sense of self regardless of the other’s response? How can I be more comfortable being guided by my heart . . . and letting others experience my heart energy? What would it be like to connect with others through my heart rather than through intellect?
September 10, 2008 at 3:04 pm
Bobby
I do not have much to add to other posts but, I will comment what I read from the cards. I have just started to read the tarot so it won’t be much.
King of Wands – you are very focused with your work, maybe too focused to start dating.
Five of Pentacles – this card has always meant “you need help,” I know that is very vague but others have already commented on your need to heal because of past relationships.
King of Swords – as others have said, your work keeps you very busy.
I agree with others that the cups are missing, the fire is there, the spark is there but right now you are focused on other things, not on dating.
I believe that when you are ready you will find yourself a kind, loving man. 🙂
I hope I have helped at least a little.
Best of luck in all your endeavors.
September 10, 2008 at 3:05 pm
Bobby
Sorry, in the five of pentacles entry above, I meant to say “this card has always meant…to me” 🙂
September 10, 2008 at 7:55 pm
suz
their implements in their left hands –
Wow – the comments got real interesting after I logged off … whew.
Looking now with a fresh eye at the cards (without peeking at comments yet) I wonder if the readings shows something getting stirred up.
[L to R movement from blue-sky clarity and past-looking to
clouds, a somewhat wider perspective, and a grim- or stern-faced KSwords]
The inquiry that occurs to me now is: What is “that thing” that was the alive, loosely-held wand, then the supporting crutches, then the gripped sword.
p.s., I WISH i would have thought the crippled animus part … but *blush* I didn’t … LOL this isn’t about “me” anyway – what counts is what’s elicited for you, right?
Thank you so much for commenting btw – really validating for the uncertain!
September 10, 2008 at 9:43 pm
TarotByArwen
Kg Wands Man of Action, Passion, Energy, Liked to move
5 of P Search for home. Search for something you felt you’d lost. Search for spiritual community.
Kg Swords Mental stimulation fed you.
That’s my quick, down and dirty take. For me it was more about a search than anything else. 🙂
September 10, 2008 at 10:59 pm
Amberlyne
Mary, am feeling that the King Of Swords represents a man coming into your life soon that you need to be receptive to.
September 10, 2008 at 11:00 pm
Pedro Ribeiro
I was struck by the way you arrived at the question – instead of saying “It’s been a long time since I dated, I feel lonely”, you saw a Forbes Magazine report about the most “dateable” cities and found odd that you didn’t date after divorce, even though you visited/lived in those cities. I mean, this is very rational, very King of Swords to me. The King of Wands is present in the very direct way you dealt with the question – you put it in a blog and asked! Very direct, and apparently un-water-ish, hence the absence of Cups in the spread. This may indicate something about the way you deal with feelings and relationships.
September 11, 2008 at 12:45 am
Skye
My gut reaction to the 5 of Pentacles in this reading is “That’s not fair! What did I do to get thrown out on the street? Please let me in!”
Since your question was about how these cities are considered places conducive to meeting romantic partners and your experience being different from that, I think the 5 of Pentacles may point to deal feelings about being shutout from the dating “scene” that these cities represent. I’m taking the glowing light from the inside of the building and the figures looking wistfully inside as my cue for that interpretation. Since there are 2 figures in the 5 of Pentacles perhaps there is someone else, or just others in general, that also feel this way about the difficulties of meeting someone new (maybe these people will pop up in the future).
Also, the Five of Pentacle could represent that what you’re looking for at this point in your life is security and companionship to get you through the tough times rather than a passionate romance (King of Wands) or a philosophic connection (King of Swords). Obviously, I feel that the 5 of Pentacles is the key card here!
Good luck, Mary (and thanks for the opportunity to interpret)!
September 11, 2008 at 1:09 am
Elise
I haven’t had a chance to read through all the comments, but what I was struck by was the strength…possibly intimidating strength…of the Kings.
Could it be that your accomplishments and presence make it harder for suitors to approach you…resulting in an alienation (5 of coins)?
I always consider that the 5 of coins includes the very church where the two characters should be able to find solace…in the times when these images were evolving, the church could be counted on as a place of shelter and comfort in a much stronger way than even present day churches. So the “sure thing” doesn’t work out in the 5 of coins…just as these cities weren’t “sure things” for dating for you.
Maybe it would be helpful consider how you could be perceived as intimidating, through no fault of your own. And at the same time, what kind of a person it would take to NOT be intimidated by your accomplishments. That ideal individual might solve more riddles than simply being able to handle your position in life…s/he would likely come with their own intriguing accomplishments and exciting life to share. More than just companionship.
It could just be that dating will never be as simple as a top-40 city list for you…but more importantly, why should it be? My sense is that neither you or what you’d want in a relationship can be reduced to a linear measurement.
(Also, to be fair, I’ve lived in Dallas, and had a terrible time dating…if you said “tarot” or even “feminist” to someone, they just might hide under the couch or leave you standing in the popcorn line…so I’m suspicious of this list 🙂 )
Thanks so much for sharing, Mary!
September 11, 2008 at 2:39 am
mkg
Daniel – I like the way you added that my area of lack is bracketed my comfort zones (strong power bases in the King of Wands and Swords)—they do keep my insecurities under control and feeling relatively safe. I tend to not subscribe so much to the missing suit as being the solution (there has to be at least one in a three card spread). I feel I do connect to others with heart, it’s just I’m not putting myself out there romantically. I don’t have any desire to flirt. I think there’s a difference.
My first reaction to the list was humorous surprise that I had such a personal relationship with the first dozen cities. I wondered where the humor came from and realized it was irony because you would assume I was drawn to the singles scene—which I never really have been.
I do protect myself from a sense of not fitting in that could stem from my childhood moves. Although I enjoyed the travels, I wondered, at times, what it meant to call some place home, and I may very well have projected my sense of being an outsider to see myself as perpetually outside what people call comfort or home. I even pride myself on belonging to an “outlaw” profession—though I will defend it’s value with everything I have.
September 11, 2008 at 3:18 am
mkg
Bobby – You could be right – I need help, but I keep everyone at bay. I also work in a “helping profession.” You don’t know how hard it is for me to do this public reading! But, somehow I felt compelled to look at this area I avoid.
Suz – Interesting about the progression of key implements. The King of Swords is strongly off-putting, but I’m comfortable with that.
Arwen – As I mentioned above, I do have a certain outsider identification. I feel most at home in intellectual interactions.
Amberlyne – The King of Swords is definitely my kind of guy.
Pedro – I’m sure you’re right that I deal with most things very directly and rationally. I have a *lot* of Scorpio but it tends to embarrass me when it comes out.
Skye – I’m not so sure that I’m looking for the kind of security you mention, so in response to your comments, I told myself a fairy tale about the Five of Pentacles. Although the woman (in my story) was desperate for warmth, she was going to walk by the church although it was warm and singing could be heard, because she knew it wasn’t her kind of place. The woman was hurrying to find something else—plainer, not so elaborate and impersonal as a big church—more like a small, quiet pub with a corner near a fireplace. She was willing to go farther, with more discomfort, to find what she wanted.
Elise – My ex-husband was just such a person as you describe and I loved him for it—but his protective energy could focus on other things, with an obtuse rationality, that left me out in the cold while he took care of other people and things.
I’ve always found it interesting that I gravitate to interesting locales and usually find myself in the bohemian center of it all, yet somehow maintain a barrier and distance. Perhaps I don’t find security in social gatherings but, rather, in maintaining a wall of self-sufficiency and intellect.
September 11, 2008 at 8:54 pm
Elizabeth Delisi
If I were doing this as a quickie reading for someone, I’d say: “You’re lonely and alone because you’re looking for Mr. Perfect. Open up your mind to all possibilities; don’t let expectations of what you *think* you’d like in a man stop you from exploring all the options out there. Who knows, someone you thought was Mr. Wrong could be the perfect mate for you!”
Liz
September 12, 2008 at 1:48 am
Shari Smith
I don’t tend to see the 5oP as being needy. I tend to see it as spiritually driven with a strong inner strength. It also has an older meaning of true love. This is the central card to the question, and the other 2 flank it.
For the question asked: What does it say that I’ve lived in five of the top 12 “Best Cities for Singles” It says that you have lived in five of the top 12 cities for reasons that have nothing to do with them being the “Best Cities for Singles.” LOL, it’s more about what was needed, and what would grow you internally, then the external needs being met. You chose the places (or they were chosen for you) you lived because they were right for you, because of what they offered for creative growth (King of Wands) or it fit analytically thinking [close to what you wanted etc.], (King of Swords). With both flanking cards being Kings I’d say you got most of what you needed from these places.
September 12, 2008 at 2:32 am
mkg
Liz – I admit to being a perfectionist but I don’t feel like I am looking for anybody. Still, I’m trying to stay open to my hiding this from myself.
Shari – I was just thinking about the other meanings of the 5 of Pentacles this morning. In the Pythagorean-influenced Continental tradition it’s a very good card meaning marriage and companionship. Christine Payne-Towler combines both traditions by saying “it’s good for love but not for money.”
In considering this new perspective I think it’s clear that I’ve willingly chosen a path that’s difficult financially and security-wise in order to focus on creativity and personal growth and to develop my writing and thinking skills (aided by all the wonderful places I’ve lived). Whereas I feel confused when I imagine all the other possibilities discussed above, I feel confident and proud when I think about this perspective. Of course both are part of the picture. However, I know I would never want to exchange the view I mentioned just for the security of a relationship.
September 12, 2008 at 8:37 am
Sharon
The King of Wands is so hot! At least he thinks he is. So… pretty wrapped up in himself. The Sword King is so cool. And he knows it. So keeps you at bay. Neither one of these guys are paying attention to what’s going on right under their feet Mary, you. Wouldn’t it be nice if one of them thought to notice that maybe you, if you are indeed feeling that insecure 5 of pentacle energy, could use a little support, some tender loving care. But I don’t think that’s in their nature. Who know’s? Maybe they’re the one’s feeling the insecurity and fear rejection. It doesn’t look like they’re going to put their weapons of protection down any too soon!
Either way, I think when you find the door to the church and go in, you might just find the guy with the Grail cup or the one with the bread and roses. That’s what you deserve Mary. You’ve got the whole wonderful package!
September 12, 2008 at 9:56 am
mkg
My Dad died today. It wasn’t unexpected and I was able to see him for the last time only a few days ago. I don’t know if he recognized me and he was very ill. I lived in four of those cities as a result of his being in the army (I lived later in two of the four by my own choice). I believe I already mentioned that he could have been the King of Swords. He lived just outside #9-Orlando until shortly before going into the nursing home. I filmed a short video of him and my brother (two Kings). I wonder how much the cards might have been reflecting this event and that this was the reason why I was so struck by the list.
September 12, 2008 at 10:13 pm
Chela
Well, the obvious is that you have been where “the action is” yet didn’t take advantage of it.
This is one of my interpretations of the 5 of Pentacles.
The men on either side – the 2 Kings, suppressing your desire by their overbearing-ness? Their strong authority? Looks like no fun to me.
Maybe these are good cities for singles, but not good for your own gentle being and sensibilities. Maybe you need a quieter, more peaceful and calm place!
Chela
September 13, 2008 at 4:18 am
Kalessin
I’m sorry to hear about your father passing.
B*B,
Kel
September 13, 2008 at 9:02 pm
Amberlyne
Condolences Mary, losing our father exposes the vulnerable part of our being. I think your analysis of the way you were affected by the “list” is spot on.
However, I still think you will meet an interesting man soon…
Blessings,
Amberlyne
September 13, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Kether
Just to add to this long list of card readers:
The king of wands is you. You are strong when you are doing your work in the world. The magic (tarot) of your work is symbolized by the salamander at his feet. You work well independently, and most of your recent personal growth has come from your work, symbolized by the green shoots of the wand. The 5 of pentacles represents the fact that you tend to choose men who are not your equals. You feel ‘anchored’ (pentacle image on window) when you are a helper to a man who is hobbled in some way physically or emotionally. It makes you feel grounded, but it tends not to be a grounded relationship. This was probably very true of your marriage. The king of swords are the type of men you are encouraged to seek. Strongly independent in their professional lives. Someone who accepts your work, but whose work is more in the world, and is not necessarily as magical as your work. An intelligent, precise man, maybe even in the world of business, who is not hobbled in any way. You can meet a man like this if you want to -if you choose to change your desire to be in a ‘helper’ mode in a relationship. So it is more up to you than the city you choose!
September 14, 2008 at 1:08 am
Shari Smith
Dear Mary, I am sitting silent for you. I do see how this could indeed been why you felt as you did when looking at these cards. When you add to the fact you lived in most of these places because of your father, it is even more potent.
I do think you are whole as a single individual. I have a saying I use. Single though choice, not by default. It is difficult sometimes in society to be single happily (which I am). I don’t think or believe it is always because we are hiding, or we are not confident in ourselves or just haven’t met the right one. I’m unwilling to compromise myself. Other things matter more. I am willing, I’m just not waiting or actively looking. I don’t believe most people can see that, and I’m not sure if this is true for you, but many people think I’m single because {fill in the blank}. When I’m single because I am.
September 14, 2008 at 2:11 am
Mary K. Greer
Sharon – Your literal characterization of hot and cool is great! As I mentioned before, I don’t really think I want to find the door to the church. I think there’s something else for me.
Chela – I currently live in a very small, quiet town. Good for reflection and writing but I love it that I have the opportunity to regularly get to one of the more exciting places.
Kalessin & Amberlyne – Thank you.
Kether – I like what you say about the King of Wands, but I don’t think anyone would ever call my ex (of 21 years) not my equal or ungrounded. He epitomized your description of the King of Swords, not that I wouldn’t want to meet another K/Swords.
September 14, 2008 at 2:44 am
mkg
Shari – Thank you for affirming the connection to my father. The more I think about this, the more I’m convinced that, on one level at least, this was a foreshadowing of my father’s passing. When I last saw him he was in a wheelchair rather than crutches—but the same idea is there. He wore an electronic buzzer because he kept trying to get out of his bed or chair and would fall (like the bell around the cripple’s neck). Yes, other things matter far more than dating just to be dating. I think I can own this now in a way I perhaps couldn’t before. [BTW, I had the time zone set wrong for my blog. I first wrote this post on 9/9 – not 09/10 and it is now 9/13 at 12:45.]
September 14, 2008 at 8:19 am
Shari Smith
mkg said: ” I think I can own this now in a way I perhaps couldn’t before.”
What better use for Tarot, and your wonderful blog then this :o)
April 28, 2009 at 5:24 pm
Andalusia
Interestingly, my dad passed away last year, too, on March 11th. He was in my local air force as a highly-decorated official & elite fighter pilot. 😦 I’m really sorry.